two more great tastes that go well together

chips and guacamole.

that must be why some genius in marketing invented Guacachips (probably TM or R or something) - the tortilla chips (or are they corn? who cares) made with real guacamole! and msg! but mostly guacamole! (and some msg. but we can suffer a headache for guacamole flavored chips, right? we were going to have one anyways, on account of the heat.)

i wasn't going to buy them but the affable fat guy with the cheap mexican beer recommended them. and when it comes to matters of snack foods, and particularly tortilla chips (or was that corn?) i generally trust the advice of affable fat guys with cheap mexican beer. after all, there but for the grace of cheap mexican beer go i. also, i lack the affable.

in any case, i decided that guacamole flavored chips just didn't go too far enough, so, despite the advice of the affable fat guy with cheap mexican beer, i got some guacamole forwithwhich to dip around the guacamole flavored chips. that's right: guacamole upon guacamole upon tortilla chips (or is that corn?) (may contain msg).

yes, affable fat cheap mexican beer guy said that guacamole upon guacamole is going overboard, and that he preferred salsa, but i went and bought guacamole for my chips. or, i would have, had i not been distracted by FROZEN VENISON BURGERS at the grocery store. in that moment, the crisis of what meat products would compliment tonight's guacamolefest was resolved, and all worries -- including the worry of what to dip my guacachips into -- were expunged from my worrying aparati.

and so i walked out of the grocery store with venison burgers (please don't tell my brother-in-law that i bought venison at the grocery) but no guacamole, a fact which escaped my attention until the moment i had swiped my credit card. i wasn't about to go back into the grocery store so i went home and regrouped.

fortunately, i know people. and people told me that guacamole is easy to make. so i got me a secret ingredient list, and walked down to my local grocery place, and gathered my ingredients, substituting anonymous red chili peppers (not technically anonymous, i just don't remember their name. they are not jalapeños.) for bright orange habanero insanity, which was tempting but the focus of tonight's banquet is, of course, guacamole, and not severe intestinal cramping, which i get quite enough of already thank you very much without having to go out of my way to cause it.

2 of the 4 avocados (nuts! now you know most of my secret recipe!) were rather hard. one of them went into the fledgeling proto-guacamole, one of them stayed in the bag to become The Guacamole Of Christmas Future. i mashed extra forcefully and now the completed and taste-tested guacamole (may need salt, depending on the saltiness of the chips) is resting for a bit in the freezer because it's nearly dinnertime and nobody likes warm guacamole, at least nobody who matters, which is to say, of course, that i don't like it.

i'm sure that if i survive the incident, i will inform you, dear reader, of the result of my overguacamolization experiment.